What can you learn from your kids?
Your parents taught you how to be parents.
They taught what to do and what not to do… by how they parented you.
Your mother said, “Wait till your father gets home!”
Your father said “This will hurt me worse than it will hurt you.”
Parents always seemed to have things backwards, until we became one.
You teach your children not to do the things you do, or do the things you never did… smoke, drink, swear, clean up, eat good food, don’t stay out late, stay out of trouble, study. To me, one of the best things about being an adult is eating dessert first. My parents forbade it. Now I do it all the time. Here are some other things I’ve learned.
Solve problems – When a child brings you a math problem, they are bringing you an example of how to arrive at a logical solution. We can learn (and teach) the balance between solving problems logically and emotionally.
Patience – There is never a reason to strike a child. That requires patience. There is never a good reason to yell at a child. That requires patience. If you can conquer those two situations, you have learned the truth about patience.
The thrill of minor victories – A base hit at a ball game, a dance performance, a piano recital, an “A” on a report card, the first bike ride…
These are the minor victories that make life worthwhile for a parent. They cost nothing, but are worth all the gold in the world.
To do the things I really want to do… NOW – Give a kid a choice of three things he’ll pick the one that’s the most fun. Do you still pick the one that’s the most fun?
You’re only young once, but you can always be immature – Kid fun is pure fun, have some as often as possible.
Counting blessings – For the things in life we take for granted. When your child is sick or in danger, nothing in the world is more important than their health or safety. Be thankful for that every day.
Imagination – Children have wonderful imaginations. Encourage them to be creative as often as possible. Adults stifle creative imagination in exchange for imagined responsibility every day. The key is to find a balance.
1999 All Rights Reserved. Don’t even think about reproducing any material in this document
without written permission from Buy Gitomer & Jeffrey H. Gitomer. 704/333-1112
“FREE SPEECH” faxback #179
Don’t be afraid to make mistakes – Kid’s are not afraid to make mistakes like we are. The trouble is we blame them for making them (like we were blamed). Blaming others doesn’t work… accept your own responsibility and become a better teacher. Kid’s don’t just start making excuses and blaming others for making mistakes… we teach them that by making excuses and blaming others ourselves.
Blind faith and trust – A kid will fall into your arms knowing you will be there to catch them. How many of you would do that now? How many of you have someone you truly trust? Or has adulthood taught you to doubt?
Unconditional love – Your child will love you no matter what. Are you being as true to that love as you possibly can be? Strive for that every day.
Persistence – As a kid in the supermarket when you wanted candy or a box of cereal you were willing to take “no” after “no” until you got your way. You were willing to cry, throw a fit, even take a physical beating to get what you wanted. To win. Are you still that persistent? Somewhere between diapers and getting our business cards printed, we have lost that drive to persist at all costs to win.
Believe in yourself…IGNORE PEOPLE WHO TELL YOU “YOU CAN’T.” It’s probably the greatest lesson in the entrepreneurial world. Try telling a
kid “no” – or “you can’t.” Forget it, she ignores you. Caution: there is a delicate balance between self-determination and following the rules of the household. Your job as a parent is to know the difference and communicate it clearly so that self-belief and self-determination are encouraged… especially for little girls.
Seek self-satisfaction… DO IT BECAUSE YOU LIKE IT.
Enthusiasm… the enthusiasm of a child comes from within. Enthusiasm comes from the Greek word entheos… The God Within.
1999 All Rights Reserved. Don’t even think about reproducing any material in this document
without written permission from Buy Gitomer & Jeffrey H. Gitomer. 704/333-1112
“FREE SPEECH” faxback #179
Seven pretty good rules…
for parents.
1. The word what doesn’t exist. When I call your name, you show up. (Control without having to say I’m the boss – because if you do, usually you’re not.) Tell them to respond “coming!”
2. No middle managers. If you have something to tell a kid you pick your own ass up and tell them. Eliminate one kid telling another what to do… mommy said you have to clean your room now… nah, nah!
3. Teach your kids that school is fun and they will love it from the time they can talk and understand (two – three years). Fight for them if they get a bad teacher. Fight like hell.
4. Encourage them at all times – everyone makes mistakes, even you. Try to support mistakes, not degrade, embarrass or belittle.
5. Hug your kids often. Twice a day at least. Tell them that you love them and that they make you proud. Praise them as often as possible. Like you wanted when you were a kid.
6. When your children talk to you, stop what you’re doing and look them in the eye. Sometimes children say more with their expression than their words.
7. Remember what you hated about your parents when you were a kid…
and don’t do that to your kids.
1999 All Rights Reserved. Don’t even think about reproducing any material in this document
without written permission from Buy Gitomer & Jeffrey H. Gitomer. 704/333-1112
“FREE SPEECH” faxback #179
